As I mentioned last week, I’m pushing myself to participate in a series started by Jessi. Women all over are writing about the ways they give up good for better. Feel free to join in and link up! I’ll keep sharing as long as I have ideas… been taking a few of yours for my personal practice, as well!
I’m a worrier. I act like I don’t, because I rarely obsess and lose sleep over things. Instead, I tend to worry with my hands – I plan, I clean, I write, I calculate, I make. I’ve denied the idea of an anxious heart for years… I’m not worrying! I’m just thinking! Someone has to do that around here, or children won’t be fed! Yikes.
Lately, I’ve been challenged to soak up the Lord’s provision, especially when it comes to smaller financial decisions. Let me explain.
We always have enough. Money is almost always tight, but never in a serious way. Just last week I answered questions about our financial stressors, for an interview related to Isaiah Jane’s therapy. I got a little nervous, because money is just one of those topics. But the questions went like this:
Have you spent time in an emergency shelter in the last month?
Have you received food from a community bank or charity recently?
Have any of your utilities been cut off repeatedly for lack of payment?
I answered each question with a sigh of relief and a prayer of thanks. These are real problems affecting real families in my real-life city every day. Meanwhile, I’m stressing about football camp? And a beach trip? New tires and new iPhones? All of those things are important to me, and I also feel like it’s important to be financially prepared for each one. But just this week, the Lord told me to stop. Stop worrying and acting like you’re not. And then he flexed His muscles a bit.
First, we were blessed with an entire week’s worth of groceries from an unexpected source (see yesterday’s post). Then I opened the mail one day to find a check from my payroll department. I’d been nominated for an incentive award at work – surprise! Just enough for my Influence ticket!
So I’m giving up worrying. Or whatever it is I’m doing – stressing in the name of “living responsibly” and “planning ahead.” I’m beginning to let it go, in order to make room for a huge God who doesn’t want to live in my box.