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Sparrow Song…

Our friends Mark & Jessie recently welcomed their second child, Sparrow Song, into the world.

Sparrow has two congenital heart issues that must be fixed surgically within the first few years of life. She underwent her first operation on Friday morning, at four days old.

She did very well and is expected to join her parents and big brother Noah at home sometime next week.

My husband, Christopher Kincaid, recorded a song a few years back, when we were dating. It was one of those spur-of-the-moment things that hit artists, and he lay down the track quickly and simply. He called it, “Bird Sonnet.” I guess he wasn’t sure what would come of it, because it sat on his computer for a long time. Until now… it is for Sparrow Song Mathis. It is her song now.

Please give “Bird Sonnet” a listen. Consider buying it for whatever you can afford. 100% of the proceeds go to Mark & Jessie, as they fight for Sparrow’s heart for the next few years.

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community fashion motherhood

CCbaby giveaway! CLOSED

  

I have been blessed (husband says LUCKY) to win a few giveaways since diving headfirst into the mommy world of internet craziness. It’s so much fun to put your name in a figurative hat and find out you’ve won some goodies. It’s even more fun to follow these businesses (most of them WAHMs) and watch them flourish. Go, mamas!

Recently, I won a wetbag from CCbaby.
Janna Craft is the owner, and she also sells her wares on etsy.
Based out of Michigan, CCbaby offers an array of baby/children items from cloth-diapering items to toys to clothes.
One of the things that pleasantly surprised me when I won the wetbag was that Janna wrote me a message immediately, asking about colors and handles and all sorts of details. She gave me several fabrics to choose from, and it was on my doorstep in less than a week. Excellent customer service!
When I asked Janna about allowing me to review and give away a product of CCbaby‘s, she welcomed me into her world with arms wide open. That woman send me a whole goodie box full of items. It was like Christmas in the Kincaid home!
I received a wool diaper cover and a pair of baby legs, both made of cashmere. This cover is, without a doubt, the SOFTEST thing I have EVER touched. Friends and family will agree. I put it on him immediately and ran to a friend’s house for the evening. She kept snuggling Ames and commenting on how soft his bum was!
It was a great fit, too. I love the way wool stretches. It’s as though the cover was made specifically for his bum, and Janna of CCbaby has never even laid eyes on my boy. So impressed!

One winner will get their very own CCbaby wool diaper cover:

The baby legs were just as soft, and a perfect fit as well! We are fans of the diaper-only outfit, so leggings come in handy when we need to keep Ames warm at night or in the cooler months. They make diaper changes easier, too!

The absorbency was great. I went through three diapers that evening before switching to our nighttime diapering routine, and I had no issues. The fitted diaper was wet during each change, and the wool stayed dry. It even smelled fresh. Magic!
I’m very thankful for CCbaby’s prices, too. Janna makes spoiling your baby easy and affordable. In addition to diapering necessities, CCbaby offers funs items like fairy wands & reusable snackbags. What a fun way to encourage your children to be creative and go green!

One lucky winner will receive this wand & snackbag:
Enter to win (comment below for each entry):
1. Visit CCbaby and tell me about a neat item.
2. “Like” CCbaby on Facebook.
3. Follow my blog.
4. Follow me on Twitter.
I’ll draw a winner via random.org on August 31. Have fun!
*CONTEST CLOSED*
Winner of the cashmere soaker – KRISTY BOCHNIAK
Winner of the ribbon wand & snackbag – EMILY ANGELL
Congrats, ladies! Y’all have 48hours to contact me to claim your prizes.
54 Comments
motherhood

time to share your cyber-fame…

So the blog world is pretty insane, boy.

A lot of blogging mamas get to stay home full-time
(an arrangement of which I am occasionally jealous).
They get to take advantage of nap-times more often than I, but I’m tryin’ to keep up!

Anyway, we bloggers get online and talk about families, products, recipes, & all sorts of things.
Websites are devoted to picking “top mommy blogs.”
Conferences teach attendees how to write better posts & get more followers. Really!
I’d love to go to one someday. It’d be neat to meet some of the internet-friends I’ve made.
Is that nerdy? Oh well!

I’ve fallen for this big ol’ popularity contest!
It’s like middle school all over again.
Except now we don’t have braces and we shave our legs – most of us, anyway.
By the way, shout out to my own mama, Becki…
after a boy made fun of me, she let me shave the summer before 5th grade.
I cannot commit to blogging every day.
I can barely commit to showering every day!
But thanks to encouragement from friends and family,
I am going to try and branch out with “Letters to Ames” a bit more.
I wanna see how things go, love. Is that cool with you?
Thought so. You’re so stinkin’ happy & laid-back.
On my list of things to add to this blog:
+ occasional product reviews & giveaways
+ more Kincaid family-oriented updates
+ websites & articles I enjoy
Big props to your Auntie Jess for sending me off in the right direction. Jessica Masanotti is a graphic designer, artist, PR rep, wife, dog owner, gardener, & aspiring mother. Her website’s name is actually a loving reference to her own awkward middle-school years!
She has a way with words, flowers, & paper
that will make your heart sing. I am proud to call her one of my best friends, for over three years now.
I look forward to watching her launch her etsy site.
Even more so, I look forward to watching her become a mother. Read about her bittersweet conception journey here. Thanks, Jess, for all you do for me! I am not done harassing you, though, so thanks in advance for all of my blog-related issues I will rope you into!
Alright, Ames, enough for now. 
It’s funny how things come full circle.
I kept a journal here as a teen, another blog here as a young adult, and yet another here while I planned my wedding. Sheesh!
So…here we go again!
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motherhood

NO REGRETS.

Ames, your momma can be one neurotic, guilt-stricken lady.
I stress about the details, I want to do things right the first time, and I’m always too hard on myself.
I have two big “regrets” from my relationship with Christopher thus far…

1 – When I came home from Alaska, I was really awkward with your Daddy. Read the story here.
I’m still kicking myself for not running straight into his arms and smothering him with kisses the day I returned. He was so beautiful. And I was so fat. Anyway, we’ve thankfully recovered from that season!

2 – When I got pregnant with you, it was a semi-surprise… Chris kept making jokes about it, wayyy before my period was due. So one day, after he left for work, I took a pregnancy test – BY MYSELF. He has never let me live that down. He was so mad (happy about you, of course) that I left him out of such a big moment. Oops.

When it comes to you, there are SO MANY THINGS about which to fret and regret later on!
Where to have you. How to have you. What to name you.
How to feed you. What to do with your penis. What to do about vaccines.
How to diaper you. Where to sleep you. When to leave you.
Good grief!!
Thanks to be God, though. I can honestly say I have no regrets thus far.

I have met many women who wish they had done things differently.
They don’t walk around feeling defeated by any means.
They simply let on that they would like to go back and “fix” certain things.
Sometimes, it’s because they were pressured down a certain path.
Other times, they just didn’t know better.

I am thankful, Ames. God has been so good to us when it comes to you.

Your birth was perfect. I didn’t have to transport or end up with an emergency c-section.
You were healthy. You took awhile to breathe properly and even longer to nurse, but it was perfect.
I know it was over 20 hours long, but your labor felt like the perfect sun-up to sun-down experience.
Our closest friends were there. Your dad handled everything like a champ. It was unbelievable.
This diapering thing has been so much fun.
You’re currently wearing a lot of fitteds (still love Goodmama & Muttaqin Baby)
and flats / prefolds with wool covers.
Did you know that wool acts like an air-conditioner in the summer and a heater in the winter?
It always smells fresh, too… and it only needs to be washed once a month or so!
I never thought I’d put you in such hippie garb, mister.

My love, I know I will make plenty of mistakes with you.
I know you will forgive me again and again…
 and I want to thank you for the grace you’ve shown me already.
But for now, it feels really good to look at you & be at peace with the way things have gone thus far.
I’ve got no regrets.
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motherhood

You know you’re a parent when…

You’re almost 8 months old, Ames Emmanuel!
Oh man! I’m absolutely crazy about you. Even more so then the day you were born.
I remember staring at you early on, wondering when
you’d grow up enough for me to enjoy you.
How awful does that sound? Well, the time has come! I enjoy you,
and you seem to enjoy me, too.
You light up when I get home from work.
You coo and cackle and show off your four teeth every chance you get.
I am so impressed with how talented you are, too – crawling and pulling up already!
We had to lower your crib a few weeks ago when we saw this after a nap:
This should make up for the fact that you are so stinkin’ tiny…
Last time we checked, you were in the 2nd percentile for weight – peanut!
We’ve only been to the doctor one time… we went to a family practice. I had an annual exam, in order to qualify for a health insurance discount, and you had a well-baby visit. We’ve decided not to vaccinate you at this point, so doctor’s appointments are sort of overkill for us. But they weighed you and all that, and of course it made me paranoid. So no more weighing you for awhile! As long as you’re making wet diapers and loving life, I’m not going to worry.
Some “you know you’re a parent” tidbits I’ve come across these last few months:

I know I’m a momma because I feel more comfortable, more beautiful, more sophisticated, even more sexy – when you’re with me, Ames…I feel like I can’t hang with the twenty-somethings without kids!

Thank God for your daddy… He has done a fantastic job of making me feel desired. He’s also complimenting the way I look, as well as encouraging me with breastfeeding and other “mama duties.” He still changes your diaper after our morning nursing session (you’re sleeping 8+hours each night!) and I can hear him whispering sweet nothings as he carries you away from me. You are one loved baby, Ames. Don’t even get me started on your brothers… Lucas is going to make one fantastic father someday.
I know I’m a momma because my clothes are mostly jersey knit. This is something that must be fixed asap… too bad another part of “you know you’re a parent” comes in here – we’re taking Dave Ramsey’s class, Financial Peace University! It’s changed our lives and taught us so much about the importance of living responsibly. So, for now… the clothes can wait. T-shirts it is!
I know I’m a momma because I get excited over what I use to catch your poop. We’ve begun to really enjoy putting you in All-in-Two’s – where the insert is removed and a new one is put in, but the cover stays all day long! We particularly like the Flip system, as well as SoftBums.
I know I’m a momma because I’ve made friends ONLINE. I’ve been keeping up with Twitter, Facebook, and different blogs in order to meet other mamas and enter giveaways. So far, I’ve won quite a few free diapers, laundry detergent, and cloth wipes!
Your poppa calls me his lucky charm.
I’ve also gone to meet-ups in Charlotte that support cloth diapering, babywearing, breastfeeding, etc.
We’re just crunchin’ away!
I know I’m a momma because I only went to the ocean one time when we took you to the beach. I’d much rather lay out on the dock or play in the sound while you nap inside… no wonder my mom always stayed behind when we hit the surf! We spent a long weekend at the Mizpah house on Topsail Island. You and your brothers had a blast. The first night, we camped. You stayed up for hours in our tent – crawling around, squealing in delight, and pawing at our faces.

The most important life change: I know I’m a momma because I’m learning to relax.

I let Avery play a game on my iPhone the other day at a restaurant, for goodness’ sake!
Each moment I have with you guys is one to be cherished. 
I’m not going to let them slip away.
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health & wellness motherhood

All of my kids…

Ames, you already know you have to share me with your two older brothers, Lucas & Avery.
But did you know you share me with an unlimited number of kids at Momma’s work? 
I work with 3-11 year-olds at a behavioral health hospital. 
The patients’ problems span a vast range, but all of them are in need of love. 
I do my best to give it to them. 
I entered a CottonBabies contest for Mother’s Day. The prompt was to write a letter to a little person…
“I’m so glad you were born.” For some reason, I kept thinking about my kids at work.
Here’s what your momma wrote:
______________________________________
To my patients on 2-East (children’s locked unit @ a behavioral health hospital),
All of you are broken and hurting. Most of you live day to day, bed to bed, meal to meal. Some of you will never see your mothers again. And a few of you have never known a mother’s love at all. Though I have two children by marriage and my own new baby at home, I come to work each day in order to mother you the best I know how. And to think – I went all the way through nursing school, clueless to the fact that I’d wind up a psychiatric nurse, taking care of you kids. I can’t explain any other way than to say it just feels so right. You are where I belong.
I loved you, even before you walked through the front doors of the hospital. When I met you, my heart broke all over again. I think about you when I leave work, and I try my hardest to make you smile each time I see you. You have given a whole new meaning to the word, “patience.” I know it’s hard for you up on the unit. Nobody’s ever cared for you the way we do. Nobody’s ever followed your every move, keeping you safe and teaching you how to function in society.
When I see you grow frustrated with tasks you’re not used to doing. I know it’s coming – that familiar rage you’ve grown so used to feeling. When I see your jaws tighten and your fists clench, when I ask you to take a time out, and even when I’m holding you as you swing and kick and battle those demons within, I want you to know that I’m loving you the whole time.
I’m praying for you, and I’m cheering for you. I want the world for you kids. Each time I escort one of you off the unit upon your discharge, I say a quick prayer that I’ll never have to take care of you in these circumstances again…that I’ll only run into you in the community, you with big grins on your faces and me with a heart full of pride. You are not mistakes. You are not forgotten. You are the future, and I am so thankful to be a part of it. I am so glad you were born.
______________________________________
I only wish I could include a picture (arghh, HIPAA) of one of my patients.
 I’ve had some really cute ones.
Anyway, baby boy… thanks for sharing your mother. 
Thanks for making me a mother. 
Happy  Mother’s Day, boy.
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community household management life lately marriage motherhood

Parenting in Public, 24/7…

Ames, your older brothers are getting really big. Lucas is 10, and Avery is almost 8! Here they are a couple of months ago, hanging with you in your room.

I can’t believe how fast time flies. It feels like only yesterday that I taught Lucas how to tie his shoes. I started dating your papa when Lucas was 4 and Avery was 2. Now Lucas is in the Gifted & Talented program at his school, working on things I feel like I learned in college. Avery’s lost his baby chub face and is climbing to the tops of trees in five seconds flat.

Chris & I have dreamt and planned to one day own a house together. We want nothing more than to give you a stable place in which to grow up and call home. The day has come! We’re finally at a point where we can buy a house, one big enough to fit all of you boys!
Can you believe it? You can see your room from these pictures – top right. So exciting. And to think, this whole thing came about in just a few months. Our lease was almost up and we wanted to stay in the area, in order for the older boys to stay at their school. We drove around and found a new neighborhood, with big ole’ houses in our price range! The house has taken a total of two months to build – good grief! We’re supposed to close at the end of next week. I’m giddy. We were out of our rental home a few months before the new house was ready, though. My parents, your Chief & Sunshine, were kind enough to let us stay with them. 2 adults, 3 boys, and 2 dogs have set up camp at their house, living out of suitcases and laying cloth diapers out to dry on their back deck. They are so precious to let us invade every nook and cranny of their lives like this. We are eternally grateful! Which brings me to my point… I think living with adults has made me a better parent, if for no other reason than I’m being watched by other parents. Parenting under surveillance. Huh? Let me explain.
Most parents do their best to appear experienced and relaxed in public with their kids. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched a screaming kid quiet down in a restaurant after getting the shoulder pinch, while his mother smiles innocently at other diners.  Then there’s the kid who gets dragged back under the dressing room door after trying to escape, but his mama says, “Sweetheart, don’t you wanna try on these pants?” in a honey-sweet voice.
Your home is your sacred space, and the place we parents feel most comfortable. Our kids can run around with dirty faces after dinner, screaming at the top of their lungs and leaving a trail of toys behind them. In my house, they usually clean their faces and rooms before bed. But sometimes they don’t. And I don’t lose sleep over it either way. But what if you’re living with another set of parents? A set that raised you, no less? A-W-K-W-A-R-D! It was all my fault, but I started out living life at Chief & Sunshine’s as if I was up for some award or something – or worse, like I was in danger of losing my job and someone had come to evaluate me. Every time you’d grunt and groan, I’d want to change your diaper. Heaven forbid they smell something! Every time you’d fidget and fuss, I’d want to pick you up and quiet you. What if my parents heard? And don’t even get me started on the older boys… Those miniature hurricanes aged me 20 years when we moved in with Chief & Sunshine.

But then my dad intervened. The man I called “Scary Gary” throughout my teenage years asked me to get coffee with him one afternoon, a few weeks after we’d moved in. He told me that he and my mom had opened their home to us on their own accord. They knew that we must have dirty laundry (both literal and figurative), and still they wanted us to stay with them. He told me how impressed he and my mom are with my ability to balance so much – full-time job, breastfeeding relationship with an infant, two stepsons, and homebuilding process, all within my first year and a half of marriage. He told me to lighten up. He said, “I’ll let you know if something’s out of line. Stop walking on eggshells. I’m not that scary.”

I loved it. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and went home to my sometimes-smelly and always-loud family of boys with a new perspective and boatload of patience. Don’t get me wrong – I still check your diaper too frequently and put my finger over my lips to signal “QUIET!!!” to the boys several times a day. But I know that I’ve got a set of parents who watch what I do without judgment. They are proud of me. I’m not perfect, Ames. You’ve already discovered this. But I’m doing the best I can, and I hope to make you proud, too.
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