When my stepson started growing out his hair, he stole my hairbrush. He’s always been very particular about his space and his belongings, and his hygiene routine is no exception. I’ve bought him products and I’ve taught him how to handle his beautiful curls as best as I know how, but I’ve got straight hair (much to my disappointment) and so I’ve sort of just let him run with whatever works best for him.
Anyway, he stole my hairbrush. I tried to convince him he didn’t even really need one with those curls, but he developed this ritual of brushing it out after the shower and after a few weeks I gave up trying to get it back. A few weeks after that, I gave up the trips upstairs to “borrow” it. A few months after that, I realized I didn’t even miss it. I’m not sure how long it’s been, now. At least a year, I think?
Isn’t it crazy how we just make do? When people find out we only have clawfoot tubs in our house, or that we don’t have a dishwasher, it gives me the same realization. Those things sound weird to me too but somewhere along the way, we just made do with what we had. Instead of brushing my hair, I just run my fingers through my hair or use of the little kids’ combs. I take baths, and I wash my hair in the sink when it feels really important. We hand wash our dishes and take turns drying and build community in that kitchen and whip each other with towels and make up after fights while we scrub. We just make do and it’s beautiful.
Don’t get me wrong, I keep meaning to buy a new hairbrush. I want a total bathroom makeover (times two) in our house. And please oh please, Lord Jesus and husband of mine, may I have a new kitchen before I die? I just find it so interesting how easily we adapt to our circumstances. Once we quit fighting the change or complaining about where we are and where we aren’t, we have the space to shake our heads clear of the cobwebs and look around. A “make do” attitude gives us room to grow and thrive and find the beauty in new territory we never wanted to take to begin with.
3 Comments
So good Rachael. Thank you for sharing this perspective :)
first of all, now i’m super curious to see what your son’s hair looks like before after brushing. Lol and second of all, thank you for sharing this – it’s a tough life trying to force something when there is the option to adapt and grow <3
We’ve spent many years living on less than we expected we would and I agree! I went a year and a half without a working oven or stove and yes, I missed it (and just about cried the first time I pulled brownies out of it once it was fixed) but we made do and it was okay. I spent a long time working in community mental health and saw every day how adaptable and resourceful people can and will be – it’s encouraging to know that even while we hope for more, there are ways to make “making do” good and beautiful.