I count it such a blessing that we’ve never had to deal with the death of a baby in utero. No matter the stage or progression of pregnancy, it is a life lost and a life mourned. I certainly don’t take my fertility or my family or my life for granted. With this month being National Pregnancy Loss Awareness Month (the official day was October 15), I wanted to take a minute to honor a few moms who have been on my heart lately. Each has her own story, and each story has already been made public.
1) Jessi was overjoyed to find out she was pregnant a few months ago, and she looked forward to welcoming her family’s fourth baby next year. At an appointment a few weeks later, though, they were struck with the news that there was no longer a heartbeat. She named this sweet baby Arrow; and although it tore her up something fierce, this season has taught her so much. You can tell by the beautiful things she writes under the label “miscarriage” at Naptime Diaries.
2) Kara has been very open about her journey to motherhood, over at Matt & Kara Adopt. When it became apparent that adoption was right for them, it took much longer than they’d anticipated. Longer, even, than any other adoption story I’ve ever known. However, they were finally paired with a birth mother and waited for the big day. That day has come and gone. Their boy was born a few weeks ago, and his mother decided to keep him. Kara’s nursery is ready & empty, and her friends and family are grieving along with her this month.
3) Libba doesn’t blog, but I sure hope she starts keeping tabs of her next few months. At her most recent ultrasound, it was discovered that Libba’s third baby, a girl, has no brain. The condition is called anencephaly and is incompatible with life. Libba & her family have chosen to carry this baby girl, recently named Glory, as long as they can – even to birth. In Libba’s words, “We are really looking forward to having possibly four more months to enjoy our Glory girl this side of heaven…we are open and want God to use our brokenness for His glory.”
4) Kortney was still a newlywed, having married Benjamin in May. On staff with a pro-life organization, she was on her way from a conference when she died in a head-on collision last weekend. She was twenty-one weeks pregnant with a baby girl they had just named Sophy. They were working on a documentary of her pregnancy and had recently experienced a 4-d ultrasound, a video which has since been shown all over the country in Kortney’s honor.
Each of these moms lost. Hard. Each of these families lost. Hard.
One of the special things about these ladies is that their hearts belong to Jesus.
I received a poignant anonymous question the other day, regarding Kortney’s funeral.
Chris referred to the memorial service as being “all about the glory of the Lord,” and the question said:
“I wonder if the woman’s family would disagree?? That is just the type of statement that gives Christians a bad name.”
I completely understand and respect the importance of grieving, but each of these families has their hearts set on things above. As Christians, we believe that pain & darkness rule this earth. It’s how we can believe in a God who loves, and still admit that horrible things happen every day.
These hurting families dream of a place where there is no pain, no tears. When they lose, they lose hard. But they know that this is not the end of the story, and their souls are able to rest in that. The nights are long, but joy comes in the morning.
These women are true testimonies to God’s faithfulness.
You don’t even have to be a follower of Jesus to see His glory all over them.
I am in awe of that.