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the bag?

Remember this post? The one where I talked about all the things I’d like to have and do someday?

I think I may have found the bag.

Chris & I enjoyed some alone time this evening, in honor of our anniversary. We did a little Christmas “elfing,” stuffed ourselves with sushi, and even made a grocery stop – imagine that.

At the mall, Chris offered to take a look around Cole Haan. I like to pop in every now and then, just to keep tabs and make sure the classic style I hope to own someday hasn’t died off completely. There are a lot of fun trends out there, but I plan on buying for life. I’ve never owned a high-end handbag. This purchase will most likely go to the grave with me, so I’d better make it count.

Lo and behold, this baby was tucked away towards the back. It meets pretty much every handbag requirement I’ve carried around in my head all these years. Chris encouraged me to hold the thing, and the sales guy even put my wallet in it for me. I kept babbling on about Dave Ramsey and how you’re less attached to the purchase if you don’t touch and how we needed to discuss it over dinner.

The best part? The bag is on sale… like, practically half off.
Which is precisely why I didn’t buy it.

I need to sit on it for a few days.
People may think an expensive bag is a frivolous purchase, but we all have our own convictions. A nice handbag is one of the few things on my wish list, and it has been for years. Lately, it’s become a more realistic idea for me. We’ve worked hard to get to a financially responsible place as a family. We’ve been generous with our children and others. At the same time, I’ve waited so long that an indulgence almost feels wrong now.

Is it the thrill of the chase? Is it the guilt of the purchase? Would I want this exact bag as much if it was not on sale? Will I be willing to pay full price for a different bag in a few months? I’m almost embarrassed by how much thought I’m giving to a silly purse!

It reminds me a lot of this post I read earlier this week. Jessi’s words brought me to tears. There’s something about motherhood that threatens to strip women of their sense of worth and value. I’m not sure buying myself a bag that doesn’t hold diapers will completely cure me of my own insecurities, but it sure sounds nice this evening!

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4 Comments

  • Reply jae December 16, 2011 at 11:38 AM

    i understand where you’re coming from, but i think that just for once, you should spend a little money on yourself. there are some things i wouldn’t buy if it was full-price, precisely because it’s full-price and i can think of so many things that the extra other half of the money could go towards. but if it’s half-price, you should go for it. if you are going to use it, and love it while you own it, if it fills your requirements for a bag, and if you’re saving money buying it…you should go for it. just my .02$ :)

  • Reply jess @ notes of life and love December 17, 2011 at 9:07 AM

    Exactly how I feel. I can’t even buy a pair of new jeans or undies without over thinking and feeling guilty. That post Jessi wrote was beautiful.

  • Reply Jessica West Judkins December 17, 2011 at 1:38 PM

    Super cute bag! I do the same exact thing, especially with new items. I think its just because I am a thrifter at heart and I keep thinking can I find a better deal at a thrift store, but then I would have to search a bunch of stores wait a few months and the bag might be smelly. But goodness for a new one thats half off its a steal!

    Also your sushi dates make me crave sushi for weeks :-) I think I am going to suggest a sushi date with Scott

  • Reply Lorni December 19, 2011 at 1:26 PM

    you deserve a little something special every now and then!

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