Hi! I’m Rachael – a nurse, a musician’s wife, and a momma to five kiddos. I blog about our life over at www.letterstoames.com! Stop by sometime.
Carey asked me to write a little something about my experience with a growing family. When I married my husband, I became an instant mom – he has two sons from a previous marriage. We became pregnant with our own son shortly after getting married. 17 months after Ames was born, the twin girls came along! If you’re confused, it’s okay – we are still reeling a bit, too. My husband has been known to call all of the kids “Steve” at one point or another (note: no one in our family actually has that name).
One thing I noticed shortly after the twins were born was that I couldn’t force a routine or a schedule right away like I did with Ames. As a result, things have actually been easier – more laid-back, more relaxed. My son is the most amazing toddler on the planet. He loves to sleep, he loves to eat, and he loves to be around people. He’s adjusted to having two sisters with a ridiculous amount of grace, and it’s taught us to be more flexible. This week, Ames takes two naps a day, something he hasn’t done in months. Normally, I’d be reading stuff on the internet and trying to “fix” it. But I’m not going to worry about it. This week, it’s working for us. The same goes for the girls. Sometimes, they nurse & nap in the car. Sometimes, one of them has to wait for a diaper change while the other is eating. It’s okay. Grace abounds.
Another thing that has been radically different this time around is my acceptance of help. I went back to work very early with Ames, so I pretty much held onto him 24/7 outside of that. I paid dearly, as I could have used a break. Instead, I suffered some postpartum depression in silence (or occasionally, by way of tearful tantrums at home). Although the twins were born mere weeks ago, Chris & I have already taken a few trips out alone and left the kids with one of our moms. This has done wonders for our marriage and our sanity. The girls have also spent a little time in the nursery at church, so that I can actually listen to the message instead of breastfeeding in a dark corner somewhere.
Both forcing myself to relax and taking time away from the babies takes a little adjusting and a little work, but it’s been so worth it.